Being Understood Shouldn’t Be This Much Work.
Virtual, trauma-informed therapy for lesbians throughout New York State.
You already know who you are, and most days you feel really settled into your life. But sometimes you feel restless or uneasy. Maybe you and your partner are both so good at accommodating that no one says what they actually want. Or because your ex is in your friend group, your friend group is your whole community, and the community feels very small right now. Or because you’ve been the capable one for so long that you picked a partner who needed you to be. Maybe you’re just here because you want a therapist who recognizes that being a lesbian is a very specific experience, but it is not the only experience you’ve ever had.
You might relate if you:
In your relationships
Are in a relationship where you’re both so conflict-averse that small things go unsaid until they’re big
Notice you and your partner are always accommodating each other, and neither of you is sure what you want
Feel you’ve lost yourself in a relationship, or that the closeness has started to feel like fusion
Take on the caretaker role in your partnership and resent it, or wish you could stop
Have a sex life that has gone quiet, and don’t know how to bring it up without it turning into a fight
Carry old wounds, from your family or earlier relationships, that show up with a partner who has her own
Are trying to decide about marriage, kids, or building a family, and want to talk it through without anyone’s agenda
In your community
Are navigating friendships and exes in a community where everyone is connected
Feel lonely even though you’re surrounded by people who “get it”
Miss spaces that have closed, or feel out of step with how the community has changed
Have burned out from being the organizer, the ally-educator, or the friend everyone calls
Are worn down by the news, and by how often your rights and safety are in the headlines
In your family and in the world
Have a family that accepts you in theory but never asks about your partner or your life
Are invited to holidays and still feel like a guest, or like you’re being tolerated
Are tired of microaggressions from people who think they’re being supportive
Have a complicated relationship with your mother that shapes how you show up in love
Feel like you’re always the “difficult” or “intense” one, even when you’re asking for something reasonable
perfectionism therapy
therapy for people pleasing
therapy for self-worth
therapy for self-criticism
therapy for overthinking
therapy for low self-esteem
therapy for high functioning anxiety
therapy for self-doubt therapy for fear of mistakes
therapy for intuition
therapy for self-trust
I’m Gina Sacino, MS, LCAT, a Licensed Creative Arts Therapist in Rochester, NY, providing virtual therapy throughout New York State.
Therapy for lesbian relationships
Two people who learned to put others first can create a relationship with a lot of care and not much honesty. We work on saying what you want, handling conflict, and staying close without disappearing.
Therapy for intimacy and desire
Desire changes, and it’s hard to talk about. We make room for what’s going on, without assuming that something is broken.
Therapy for friendships, exes, and community
A small community can feel like both a home and a pressure cooker. We look at boundaries, loneliness, and what you need from the people around you.
Therapy for lesbian burnout
You’ve been the strong one, the advocate, and the one who holds it together. We make room to put some of it down.
Therapy for family-building decisions
Marriage, kids, no kids, or not sure. We sort out what’s yours from what’s expected, at your pace.
What we do in session
I’m warm, direct, and relational, with a little humor, and we go at your pace. Together we:
Take your identity as given, and spend our time on the rest of your life
Look at the patterns you learned in your family and how they show up in your partnership
Practice saying what you want, handling conflict, and staying connected while you do it
Work on boundaries with family, exes, and community
Make room for anger, grief, and the guilt that can come with both
Work with the body as well as the story, using a trauma-informed and creative approach
Build self-trust, and the kind of closeness that doesn’t cost you yourself
What feeling better can look like
You and your partner can say the hard thing and stay close. You can be close to someone without losing yourself in her. Your community feels like support instead of a pressure to hold it all together. You feel known by the people who matter. You rest, and your needs count as much as everyone else’s.